Sadly, I am feeling disconnected from my passion. I feel sad – just very, very sad! This is my first Christmas since Mom passed. I didn’t think it would hit me so hard. To be honest, I hadn’t really thought of it at all, but all of a sudden, I became aware of a certain heaviness in my soul that I realized was nothing more, nothing less than a soul-deep sadness. I simply miss Mom!!!
I miss knowing that I can pick up the phone and hear her voice. I miss just knowing that she’s sitting in her chair at home. I miss being able to consult some cooking question with her!! I miss her laughter and her sense of humor!! I miss so many things about her!!
I wish she had taught me how to make my eyes twinkle! She knew how to do it and it never failed to tickle me when I saw her twinkle her eyes! I wonder… is that something you can learn or are you born with it? Nana, Mom, and her sisters all knew how to twinkle their eyes. I wish I knew how, too!!
I will choose to think of Mom looking down on me and loving me. When I see the stars twinkling in the inky black, winter, nighttime sky, I choose to think that they’re all Mom – watching over me, accompanying me as I go about my day-to-day!!
I miss you, Mom!! I love you!! I am forever grateful for all that you taught me and gave me!! I am proud to be your daughter and I know that you are proud of me!! May you forever rest in the peace you so deserve and may you twinkle your eyes down on me forever as a sign of your unfailing, forgiving love!!
I feel better already!!!
[Special thanks to sister Judy for sharing this picture with me!! This was the last sunrise that Mom enjoyed.]